A Trip across The Omniverse

the edge of krakow.
a young man is going home to wroclaw.
160kmh baby poland is going baby
a momentary lapse, and i'm out.

more roadworks, walking walking.
fast cars won't stop
and fast trucks don't stop and don't stop and don't stop

and then stop.
my polish namesake beckons me in.
i like to speak english
i like to watch tv while i drive,
here is my boy, and my wife.
i'm only driving a little way
but i'll find you a ride,
some beers, a schnitzel, a prostitute, a new day.

i'll find you a ride. and he's on his cb
Ein turist, Ein turist, australiansk turist, CURVA ein turist.
Success, a truck has pulled up behind.
i say goodbye and transfer

now i'm riding and hoping
not communicating, smoking.
At the border i'm ejected.

a wiener, a shit in the trees,
standing at the safest spot for polizei to stop
keine fur autobahn!
so i walked back to poland and waited

until a missionary took me
his house was under construction
all the way to dresden.

Hitchhiking Gods

You are not going to get picked up for a while
for a while?
for a while
Can I leave?
You can leave
And will you tell me when to come back?
no
so how will i know when to come back
you won't
so what should i do?
Wait
Wait?
Stick your thumb out
to all those cars?
even the ones that won't stop


Forward thumb, high thumb, dancing thumb.
bouncing ball on thumb, throwing rocks with aid of thumb.

Can’t I just not be here?
no.
i'm cold. can't i just go inside?
you can go inside.
and I can just wait in there and get warm for a while
you can wait in there,
and you'll tell me when it's time to go?
I tell you when it's time to wait.


what’s the point i’ve been here for hours nobody’s going to pick me up,
stick your thumb out
I've got to restrategize.
so restrategize
and if i restrategize somebody will pick me up?
no you just have to wait.
wait and?
Stick your thumb out
and?
think happy thoughts

the cars the idea of ...the idea of New Orleans, staring at the people in the cars. pulling faces at the people in the cars. happy thoughts, la la, la. I'll make them smile. hey, it's me, wanna give me a lift. hey. ha. la la la. Come on, just one smile, just one smile. is that a smile?
no that's more of a surprised look. ha ha ha. la la la. and look that fellow is outraged. i must be standing on his bit of the highway. oopsydaisy la la la ooooh she looks confused.
It's okay ma'am. I'm sticking my thumb out.
That's right. my thumb. out. no need to stop.
yes sir i know you're not going to give me a lift,
but, well, i was rather hoping, hence the thumb, out.
oh sorry ma'am if i'm bothering you, but I'm hitchhiking,
it's just the rules. you stick your thumb out

i'm hitchhiking, hitchhiking, please understand that i'm...just... f**ing HITCHHIKING
HITCHHIKING! YOU YOU YOU YOU YOU IMBECILES.
You indecent folk who don't have the common decency to pick up another human being another HUMAN BEING not one of you has room for a HUMAN BEING! Oh why is it so? Out of all these cars in this whole highway, not one of you thinks this person has anything to do with you.


you don't have to be angry.
I'm angry because you are making me wait.
I'm not making you wait.
Then why am I waiting?
You are waiting for somebody
Who?
somebody who'll pick you up.
Why?
you tell me.


They might not know me, but they will see. i will get into their heart release them from their fear invite them into my heart we'll be friends. look at me folks the friendly warrior wielding his only weapon a thumb, look at me folks, give me a lift, i'm just goofy and harmless.


somebody is slowing.
You did it.
I was goofy and harmless!
you are goofy and harmless
and that's the secret?
no
then what's the secret?
get into the car
you open the door, and you're on your own